A War – not the perfect holiday scenario

I came to Tel Aviv few weeks ago and was in a constant euphoria that made it impossible to sit down and write a blog post. My dear friends made sure that I would be busy with super fun stuff all the time. I felt alive again, I had everything that I always wanted, people that I love next to me, good weather, and a beach in a walking distance. I finally could wear my flip flops and unappropriated short shorts. I was so happy that I couldn’t be bothered by anything.

Once I started to work on one of those “why I love TLV so much” post something happened. A war happened. Just like that, in the middle of my holidays, destroying some of my plans and making me anxious and upset.

It’s not the first time that I experience war in Israel – in 2012 I had my first experience of this kind, I was terrified and ready to take the first plane back to Europe. How many of you ever faced this kind of life threat? Hiding in the shelter and feeling your stomach getting upside-down every time you hear rocket alarm? If someone told me that you can actually get use to that I would never believe it. But here I am, sitting still on my bed and writing this post knowing that every second I might hear the alarm that obligates me to go to the staircase (because I don’t have a safe room in my apartment) and wait there praying that no missile or part of it will fall on my or anyone’s house. Try to imagine that. My family and friends ask me to come back home but the thing is that for the past few years this was my home and although  my living situation is a bit more complicated now I still feel like this is my place. Yeah I know, I wasn’t born here, my family is in Poland and I don’t even have Jewish roots but my heart is with Israel and with all those people who suffer from the terror.

I get really upset and take it very personally when I see how people make opinions about the conflict without having deeper knowledge about what’s going on in here. I hate the fact that nobody see the Israeli side  – the missiles are being shut constantly and people in south and west of Israel are living under the fire for years. The technology protect us from being killed by missiles that are meant to fall on our houses – why do we need to apologize for having iron dome? I know it’s very complicated issue and that there is no an easy solution for this problem but I just can’t stand all those brain washed people that want more and more blood. I get terrified when I see Palestinians celebrating death of Israelis and I cannot understand how they can send their own wives and kids to death. I also hate the fact that an innocent Muslim boy was killed by Israelis psychopaths that were looking for a revenge.

In those sad moments I feel that people are the most disgusting of all the creatures in the world. We are worse than animals – they kill to survive and we kill for power and money. Life, that supposed to be the most sacred thing, is worth nothing. Where is the world going? When did we fall so low?

Few days ago my friend send me an email where she shared her thoughts about the conflict. What she wrote was simple yet so true:

The majority just wants peace and quiet. I wish we would start saying it out loud. And I wish we could find a way to stop the violent and start talking. It is the most natural thing to do anyway… And I wish us first to realize how we truly feel and think about the place we live in and to start searching for our own individual, beliefs. I am not a left wing. I am not a right wing. I am just feeling the pain of human beings…

People, stop being ignorant. Open your minds, go travel, see the world, make your own opinion about things. Don’t let the media to brainwash you. Experience before judging….Oh shit! Alarm.

Wanted to write few other wise things. But had to run to the staircase. My stomach went upside-down again and I forgot what I wanted to say…

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